Saturday, May 13, 2017

Snatched - Review


Goldie Hawn and Amy Schumer team up together in the Mother – Daughter comic adventure pairing simply titled “Snatched”.  What they should have called it was “The exhausting, stale, obnoxious, boring, off putting, brain dead film that “snatches” an hour and a half out of your life that you will never get back”. Yeah I know it’s a much longer title but I think you already know where this review is going.

PLOT: When emotional slacker Emily (Amy Schumer) gets dumped by her boyfriend (Randall Park) right before they’re planning to take a trip to South America, she decides to go with her overly cautious conservative mother (Goldie Hawn) instead. Things start out rocky as it’s clear the two are very opposite in their approaches in life as they end up bumping their heads at every turn instead of having fun by bumping margarita glasses together. Things only get worse as the two find themselves embroiled in a dangerous kidnapping scheme by an overly charming and handsome tourist Emily meets at a bar. Once captured the criminals call to their home back in the states speaking to Emily’s Brother Jeffrey demanding a $100,000 ransom for their safe return. Only problem is Jeffrey is a 40 year old man who still lives with their mother because he has a phobia about leaving the house as well as interacting face to face with strange people.

Feeling they are going to die given the plight of their circumstances both mother and daughter reluctantly band together forgetting all of their petty differences in the attempt to making it out of paradise alive.

REVIEW: “Snatched” may be one of the dumbest films I have seen given that the plot and trailers looked to have offered far more promise. Generally speaking if you categorize a film as a “comedy adventure” then I should do more than chuckle two times the whole movie. More importantly, I should not chuckle in a crowded theater by myself. Literally I heard not one patron in the theater laugh out loud once during its 90 minute running time. This film was depressing to watch two actors make such fools of themselves trying to connect the plot to something that was designed to be an homage to mother – daughter relationships as well as take you down the path of some good biting humor and “adventurous” entertainment.

Take it from me, entertainment wise, you would derive more pleasure by driving cross country from California to New York just to watch your initials harden in some freshly poured sidewalk cement…………………….in the dead of winter…………………in below zero temperatures ……………….than to spend money on this clunker of a film.

Per usual I never say not to see a film, but if you do want to see it, I suggest you do not waste your mother’s day money watching this in the theater. Nor should you Netflix it, Redbox it or pay $6.99 for it on cable “On-Demand”. Instead wait for it to come on TNT as part of your free basic cable………………… the year 2055. You will be senile enough by then to laugh out loud.

1.00 Star 

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